"Life is full of ugly tea stains that splash against white washed walls. Reality often seems to be more obstacle than opportunity, more pain than pleasure, more chaos than calm, more hurt than happiness, more tension than tenderness. ... I must believe that as God's woman, God is using everything in my life to make me more like Himself.
Together, He and I can take the tea stains in my life and make something out of them. We can take the tensions and be tender, take the hurts and be content, take the obstacles and build opportunity. That is what God offers me from life.
And when God says that's what He can do for me, only my unbelief keeps me from experiencing it. If the Christian life is worth living, then God is worth believing. And if I believe God, there is no end to the possibilities."
*Ruth Senter*

"Self-sacrifice is against our human nature, yet it should be part of our 'new nature.' If each of us had an attitude of self-sacrifice, what a change would come about in the atmosphere of our homes. Self-sacrifice is total unselfishness.
Loving unselfishly does not mean making the least of ourselves but making the most of someone else."
*Jo Ann Lemon*

HQ

We have new headquarters. We are in Eagan now. We moved Sunday of last week - not yesterday. :) And we have settled in for the most part. It's really nice here. The actual apartment has new carpet, new cabinets, new linoleum in the kitchen/entry way, and new bathroom accessories. I think even the light fixtures are new! Also, the really neat thing about being here is the neighbors that we have already met - in less than a week! We met our next door neighbors - a couple with a 17 month old daughter and a couple down at the end of the hall that have a 9 month old daughter - new playmates for Emma! We also met the guy who lives above us - who actually went outside looking for our cat for us, how nice is that? And the people on the third floor as well - a man and his mother - who loves kids and is totally willing to babysit anytime.

It's been really sweet considering I was almost scared to meet any of our neighbors at our last place. It's also a lot quieter here. We just got through the weekend and there was no noise Friday. Saturday, during the day it was a little busy and noisy but during the night it wasn't really at all! It's smaller in space but we've settled in nicely and I think it's going to be a really good place to live for this year.

On another note, we had celebration Sunday at church and it was great. The teens alone pledged $17,935 towards the "On the Move" campaign! It's amazing to see the faith of the younger generations. It really challenges me in what we're doing for the move and for the church in this campaign. The verses that struck me yesterday were from II Corinthians 9.

"Now this I say, he who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver." 9:6-7

"This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of God's people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God." 9:12

Scoping Out New Territory

So, as many of you know, we have had news about the job with the church. Mike did not get it. He talked with one of the pastors on Monday and found out that he didn't get it. The reasons told for the other person getting it were related to flexibility and some experience.
This has probably been a harder struggle for me than for Mike - although he's had the disappointed and angry emotions - he's usually better about dealing with them! I on the other had am not always the best at dealing with my emotions.
However, I did for the most part, vent only to God and dealt with my emotions with Him instead of taking them out on anyone else. The honest emotions were anger and frustration and a lot of questioning. In my eyes this was perfect for us in every single way - there wasn't a negative about it. I thought that we were perfect for the position, and everyone I talked to thought that we were perfect for the position too! But I'm not God and neither is anyone else ... and apparently this wasn't the perfect position for us. God has something else in store for us.
The hardest part is going through something like this and feeling like the only thing we got out of it was a big fat character struggle! And also, knowing all the right answers and Truths of the Lord in my head but not feeling them on a real level or in a real way.

God has sure tested me through this. This was the first time - that I can really remember - where I was out-and-out angry with God. I was mad - and I told Him so! But it was also really good for me to experience that feeling and to communicate it with Him - just Him. It's a small reminder of what I'm supposed to be doing every single day with every single emotion that I encounter.

Well, on another note. We still do not know where we will be living and we are moving out on Sunday. We will either be in Prior Lake or in Eagan. If we can get our money back (long story) from Prior Lake then we will for sure be in Eagan. If we can't get our money back then we will probably be in Prior Lake. I'm torn between the two. I really like and want the Prior Lake apartment because we would be in a 3 bedroom with a really nice kitchen! And it's extremely affordable. The Eagan one is affordable too but it's only a two bedroom and it's smaller than the two bedroom we're in right now. :( But it's also closer to everything and everyone!
Oy!

I'm off ... to feed the baby! The wonderful baby George.