Wednesday, February 23, 2011

The Wyatt Saga ... Part III

We've had short breaks in our Wyatt saga but today brought it all back to the forefront! 
With Wyatt's curiosity and mischievousness I was confronted with my own laziness and selfishness. 

Many times, Wyatt escapes from my view when I am focused on something else:
changing another diaper
making lunch
helping Emma and George
doing laundry

but today, today I was not distracted. 
I was simply sitting upstairs with the other three, not paying attention, and not desiring to investigate. 

We had two separate incidents today and both brought me face-to-face with my laziness. 

This morning Wyatt dumped out a mocha that was left in the fridge and then emptied the 1/4 gallon of iced tea that was also in the fridge. 
Of course, he dumped them on the carpet! 

I cringed and screamed on the inside. I cried on the outside. 

Later, just before lunch Wyatt went downstairs before the rest of us. The older two followed him shortly and I lingered upstairs for just a few minutes. Why? I don't even remember! 

Well, he decided he wanted eggs.

I think he ended up breaking 6 or 7 eggs total. 
And I cried again. 
Partly because I am so overtired, running on 4 hours of sleep, partly because I spent more money on those specific eggs than we usually do (they're cage-free, organic), and partly because I knew it was just a result of me not being present with the children today. 

And I am reminded once again that I need the Lord. 
I need His joy. 
I need His sustenance. 
Heaven knows, I cannot do it on my own.

Today seems like such a silly little thing to fall apart about, but I was gone. Pieces all over the place. 
Because I'm at my breaking point, at least momentarily. 
I know my moments of frustration and brokenness are not any less than any one else's, no matter the struggle, but I do have to laugh at myself thinking of how little this seems!

But ... 
HE is all powerful. He is all knowing. He is all seeing. 
He knows my every ache - emotional and physical. 
He knows my pain. 
He knows that I'm reaching that breaking point. 
And He wants me to break into Him. To fall into His arms.

I am reminded to:
Let His strength surround me and wrap me up completely.
To remember that the JOY of the Lord is my strength. 
We get strength from the joy of the Lord, not the other way around.
So often I think, "God just give me strength." But that's backwards according to the Word. 
God wants to fill us with joy, He wants us to seek His joy and when we do, He uses that joy to give us strength.

Am I spending time with Him? 
Am I pausing through out your day to dwell on His words, His truths, His promises? 
Are you?

Just set your Bible on the counter, open to Psalms, and whenever you're there pause and read a couple verses.
And when you do, breathe a breath prayer out to Him:
"Lord, give me Your joy."
"Lord, heal my home."
"Lord, be my strength."

And now I need to do what I tell others to do. 

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